Making fun of Faulkner

It was a sunny day out and I couldn't believe that the desert was so hot. Why he would want to move here, I couldn't say. Fifth grade was not going to be fun. My neck burned slightly from sunburn. I had forgotten to wear sunscreen, probably one of the dumbest things I could have done in Hawaii, and my scalp burned, the bare skin unused to exposure from the sun. I had to turn to one side as a group of freshmen obstinately plodded towards me, unwilling to move out of the way. It was a tight fit in the hallway, and I emerged from the dark, warm comfort of my life into a painfully bright, cold, and strange world. I squeezed my eyes shut against the glare and tried to scream in terror, but I couldn't draw breath. The world spun around, a sharp sensation and suddenly I could breath, and cried out in what I had just learned was pain. I glared at the youngster's
backs as they walked away, rubbing my foot where the fat one had stepped on it. I was crying leaning on my friend. Shut up man, we're almost at Nurse Jewel's office. C'mon, stop crying! It hurt too much. What is it this time? He hurt his foot ma'am. Oh, it's nothing, just a sprain.

"Well, it's definitely broken."

"But the nurse said it was just sprained!"

"Well, she was wrong. And by walking on it for two weeks or so, it's only been made worse. C'mon, let's walk you over to the x-ray."
The nurse grabbed my wrist, rotating into a more satisfying position. Hold it still now! The world blurred as the pain set in. Can't I have a painkiller? "The doctor didn't give me painkillers for about three hours! I lay there the entire time, thinking they had forgotten me."

"How could anyone forget you, mommy? You wouldn't let them." My dad laughed, and she turned her glare to him.

"It is NOT funny, Ben!"

"You're right, I'm sorry. What did the doctor say?"

"If things get worse, I could be paralyzed from the waist down."

Oh my god, it hurts. I can't move my legs. Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god.

"And we all must take God into our hearts, and thank him for all our blessings. Now let us take sacrament." The wine spilled back into my throat, and I recoiled, choking. Which was up? I couldn't see. Water flooded my lungs. Lights flashed in front of my eyes, my head spinning. No air. No nothing. Pain. Arms and legs tangled, green arms clutching at me... then peace.

Peace. For me, peace was not something conventional. Peace is not necessarily silence. It came only when my thoughts and mood were reflected by my music, and I could lose myself in a world unlike my own.

Nooooooo, I want to live!

Humf. You should have thought of that before.

The the man raised his gun, and shot me in the face.

"David! Dinner"

"Damn. It was just getting to the good part." I put the book aside, got up, walked to the door and

and saw nothing. Just black. Hello? Nothing. I stepped into the hall, the floor creaking beneath me. I stood still. Hello? The floor creaked. The clown raised the chainsaw, and bore down upon me. I did nothing. He stopped. He waved the chainsaw in my face. Around me. Whispered in my ear. He never touched me. Man, this place is lame. Why did you bring me here?

How are you not terrified?? I can't stop shaking!

It's obviously not real. There aren't even any spiders here.

"OMYGOD OMYGOD I hate spiders! Ewwwwww!!!" I squished it beneath my foot, cringing at the thought of being that near to such a freaking creepy thing. "Yuck!"

Yuck! I said "This book makes me feel sick. It's like a freaking roller coaster ride. I have no clue what the hell is happening, ever! First I'm here then I'm over here, as a two year old, and then I'm closer to the present but not quite since I'm only fifteen at the moment but I can't tell unless I know the ages of the people around me. Jonny's sixteen, which means it's somewhere between May 5th and May 13th, since he's nine days older than me. But then we lose all progress and go back to the age of five, because thinking about May 14th (my birthday) reminded me of my fifth birthday, and the magician pulling a rabbit out of a hat, and then suddenly it's only three hours ago because that reminded me of a little bunny that the dogs cornered behind the shed, and I think of all the fun times I've had with my dogs in an overly long and extended flashback, and then I'm back to the present where I'm writing this blog!" I finished in a rush, out of breath from my long rant.






Did you know what was going on? No? Exactly my point. (859)